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Day 10 — Dream Jobs Part I

The one good thing about being unemployed is that I can eat chocolate-chip cookies with a glass of red wine at 4 o’clock in the afternoon, which is about the time I’ve hit the wall searching for my next “big opportunity,” which is how recruiters like to phrase it. Frankly, my next big opportunity will be a job that I’ll develop a love-hate relationship with.

I still dream of winning the lottery. How do you develop a strategy to pick four and win? I ask myself when I see lucky faces flash across the TV screen. They don’t look like statisticians: They look like they could use a vacation and should lay off the grits and cheese. When I do pass the gas station and feel “in the mood” to try my luck, I stick with the scratch-off cards, hoping to recover the dollar I’ve spent buying it. Then, I think, there’s always Publisher’s Clearinghouse.

If I could write all day – and make enough money at it to support my family – that’d be great. But there are a lot of unemployed writers out there. I subscribe to a newsletter called, Revolving Door, which is published by Mediabistro, a website focused on journalism and PR jobs. When it comes out, I learn of all the poor souls who are losing their jobs in the publishing industry. I don’t know them, but they’re my kindred souls.

I never say, hey, I’m going to apply for that, because that job has been eliminated. It’s a bit like watching the ABC reality show, The Bachelor, which hooks you on seeing which hottie is going to get her feelings crushed as the number of chicks dwindles. Being the girl left standing is like the person who gets the job.

But we’re all fools when it comes to love. I know I am, and being unemployed allows for the illusion of love and hope, because that’s often all you’ve got to keep going. It must have been the reason I applied to be the next Bachelorette. But ABC will never pick me because I’m too old. Nobody wants to watch old people on TV make out. Think of all the wrinkles and body flab. Nonetheless, the illusion of hope is hope, and it didn’t cost anything to apply.

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