Girl on the Brink: Surviving Desperate Times with Desperate Measures

With the economy the way it is, companies are calling for phone rather than in-person interviews. It’s a cheaper way to screen prospective job candidates and takes less time. I’ve noticed that cash-pressed guys are also using this approach when they contact me through Match.com to make the preliminary screening before actually having to spend money on a real date.

Besides the guys who try to get off cheap with just a call, others invite me for coffee, but most ask me out for a drink “after work.” When I was younger, that meant around 6 PM. But now it’s more like 8 PM. I think that’s a long time to wait between leaving work and meeting up with someone.

Stupid me did that one time because I thought that the guy liked enough of what he saw on my online dating profile that he wanted to leave open the possibility of taking me to dinner. But such a late meet-up means the guy expects that the girl has already eaten, so he only has to pay for drinks, not a full meal, which can add up fast. [I don't do Dutch dates.]

The same thing typically happens when you get called in for an interview, right? A prospective employer never schedules an interview around the lunch hour, at least not on the first interview. When you arrive for the interview, you’re offered coffee or tea. I usually feel so bad for the secretary asking if I want anything to drink that I offer to get it myself.

Second interviews for a job often mean digging deeper into your experience, which is similar to going on a second date. You talk about things other than the basics, such as where you’re from or went to school. You compare values to see if you’re compatible. You reveal where you see yourself heading in the hope that all parties involved wish you to end up in that place. You watch body language, analyze comments and look for other signs that might indicate this is a good match and the employer or lover is taken with your charms and talents.

I think that’s where the parallels between finding a new job and a new man end because I’m sure not going to kiss the hiring manager as I would a guy if I felt some chemistry between us.