Girl on the Brink: Surviving Desperate Times with Desperate Measures

When my Lucky Brand jeans get unzipped, there’s a strategically placed label half-way down on an inside flap that says, “Lucky You!”

While I can’t show you, and you’d have to get to know me better, I can spread some lucky dust on you in the form of free concert tickets.

Between July 31 and the end of the summer, you can register and receive a free pair of e-tickets to attend one of nine concerts around the country, thanks to the Samsung at&t Summer Krush music tour, featuring The Offspring in San Francisco, T-Pain in New Orleans and Montgomery Gentry in Dallas. More acts are planned for Chicago, Los Angeles and Boston, among other cities.

In exchange for pitching this promotion, I get a free pair of Skull Candy headphones—a $20 value. Can you blame me?

Ann’s so into free stuff, especially when there’s no catch. Like tonight, the massage therapist at my gym announced to a couple of ladies, including me, that he was giving 10- to 15-minute massages in the back room. As soon as my 15 minutes ended on the elliptical machine, I knocked on his door. Busy. “Come back in 20 minutes, and I’ll give you a free 30-minute massage.”

Like, I was sold. I think there might have been a gender thing going on with him, er, her. When it was my turn, he said he’d prefer that I took off all my clothes (code for including underwear, too).

“You’re not a prude,” he said. “Oh, no,” I said. “Good, you know some people,” and he rolled his eyes to finish the sentence. Near the end of the massage, I rolled over on my stomach, and he asked if I wanted just my thighs, or thighs and gluts massa…. I said both before he/she could finish the sentence.

If this sheman copped a looked, I didn’t mind. I shaved. Lucky him, her. Whatever. I could have sure used those Skull Candy headphones!