Girl on the Brink: Surviving Desperate Times with Desperate Measures

Day 168 — Inside the Women’s Locker Room

I can’t think of a more boring job than to sit on a chair in a lady’s locker room and make sure people don’t steal other people’s stuff. The security guards who rotate at a new aquatic center in Northwest Washington, D.C., look bored, dressed in battleship gray and black. The only thing that sparkles is [...]

Day 167 — Over-Rated Words

If I read one more online dating profile about a man seeking a woman of adventure, I’m going to croak. [Audio clip: view full post to listen] I told you so. Adventure is as overused in dating profiles, as the word multitasking is in job descriptions. Whether you’re in the market for a new job or love life, potential [...]

Day 166 — Passing Over a Job, Man

When I sent a tweet that I broke up with my boyfriend, my publicist emailed me on Facebook. He said, “the man in question clearly is among the dumbest people on the planet……..to ‘have’ and then lose you would be a lifetime error.” Yah. I clearly agreed. How could a message like that not [...]

Day 165 — Things that Disapear

My underwear disappears like pencils in an office coffee mug. I swear they should be in a particular drawer but somehow they end up in another. I get so embarrassed when I leave them in the dryer because there’s an oft chance that my ex might find them when it’s his turn to do the wash. And [...]

Day 164 — Dress for Success

Office appearance and behavior has changed since the recession. People are going into work earlier and staying later, which means that something’s gotta give. That something has got to mean that people are spending less time in the bathroom. Years ago I knew a guy who spent a  lot of time in the bathroom before going [...]

Day 163 — Pickup Lines

Everybody needs a good pickup line, whether you’re picking up a man or woman, or applying for a job. When we lived in a more verbal word, our voices got a much more vigorous workout to fulfill our desires. In today’s flat-screen society, we rely too much on the keyboard and canned responses that we forward [...]

Day 162 — If Einstein Were Alive

If I were Einstein, I’d forget that whole e equals mc squared thing and postulate theories on what people really care about—money and sex. According to researchers at the Kinsey Institute for Research in Sex, Gender and Reproduction at Indiana University, 54 percent of men think about sex several times a day. But, do they [...]

Day 161: It’s Raining, Pouring, Ex Is Snoring

ANN’S NOTE: [Audio clip: view full post to listen]Listen to me speak about my manifesto, Idle Workers of the World, on NPR affiliate WRKF, recorded Labor Day 2009. “That’s a familiar face. I just can’t place it,” said my ex as I was straining to blow up my air mattress. “It’s a small dick,” I said, referring to [...]

Day 160 1/2 — Manifesto of the Idle Workers of the World

ANN’S NOTE: I decided to post the manifesto early given the outpouring of support and response I received from my appearance on the Fox Business Happy Hour yesterday. Tune in to NPR affiliate the Louisiana Radio Network at 10:45 AM EST on Labor Day to hear me speak more about it. Read the manifesto through [...]

Day 160 — Lost In the Woods

My luggage sports a tag that says, “I love not camping.” But guess what? I’m camping. After a foreign language class, I sped away from my basement apartment (yes, cringe, with my ex) and two sons in a rented car. I am not doing this to rekindle any romantic cinders left from my divorce last November. I’m [...]